This morning I'd like to focus some thoughts on the reading from Proverbs. Because the bride in this passage is inconceivably amazing. In 21 verses, we hear how she is taking on the world, and excelling in everything she does.
To name but a few of the characteristics: she’s reliable, consistent, organised.
She works hard for her money, and knows its value.
She’s the first one up in the morning, and the last to bed at night; she oversees her whole household to make sure things are done well.
She uses her resources to be generous to those in her employ, ensuring that they are looked after well, and know that they are appreciated.
She strives for justice.
She is world-wise and educated, and inspires learning for her household.
She’s a careful dresser, appreciating finer clothing but also being engaged with all the processes of what she enjoys.
She’s a hard worker, hands on in every area of commerce, and enjoys both skill, knowledge, and wisdom in economic ventures.
She’s a person of faith, who focuses on what is important and eternal, and will not be swayed by fads or trends.
She knows her land – because she walks her land in its caring.
She knows her garden – because she works her garden in its maintenance and growth.
She knows her family – because she is intentional in her relationship building and engagements.
She is a woman known for her faith, for her integrity, for the works she produces: both in her immediate circle and in the broader community.
WHEW! What a woman!
Now I'm going to make some suppositions here. About half of you are likely thinking "WHEW! That's the woman for me!"
And about half of you are thinking "WHEW! *hair flip* That woman is me!"
All kidding aside:
The ideal woman in this passage is ideal.
Literally: ideal. Not real: the dictionary defines ideal as existing only in the imagination; desirable or perfect but not likely to become a reality.
Because if we’re honest, we know that there is no way that one person could do all those things.
And that’s where part of the challenge comes in.
If people are expecting one person to be able to do all of that – they’ll be disappointed. So the passage today could serve to remind us that what we expect of someone else could sometimes benefit from a reality check.
The imagery of someone else doing all the hard work: not really helpful.
The imagery of success automatically and invariably following effort: again, not quite realistic.
The imagery of male verses female roles – yikes, friends; there’s a whole lot of gender-related issues that arise when this passage is read from a binary perspective or a place of inequality. But that’s a sermon for another day.
Where I invite us to journey today is to consider – right back to the beginning – the first description of the woman in question.
A Capable Wife? Who can Find??
Hmm. Capable.
That’s an interesting howdy-do that can be too easily overlooked when we hear the next 20 verses expounding the virtuosity of our Wonder Woman here.
A capable wife.
The Hebrew for this is Eshet chayil
Eshet meaning woman, or wife. Okay, seems easy….
Chayil is translated as worthy, strong, powerful, virtuous. It describes valour, efficiency, ability, excellency.
So our woman of valour then – this capable, excellent ideal woman: she remains an ideal.
We don’t know what she looks like, or what her voice sounds like. We haven’t heard about her height or body shape or eye colour or bloodline:
Because those things don’t matter. They are not what make her who she is – this mythologised woman who is so highly praised, at home and in the community and beyond the city gates – if she were a real person, in the time and society where a woman’s worth was her bride price or her physical appearance, or her child-bearing – in that society we would have heard all about what she looked like; how long her hair was, how delicate her steps were, how elegant her demeanor was… you get the idea.
The perfect woman of this proverb is a celebration of character, not of role.
The valour of a person is in the essence of who they are. As Rachel held Evans puts it: “women of valor can be found in all kinds of cultures, in all kinds of roles, and in all kinds of circumstances. The truth is, a woman of noble character will fulfill any role with valor.”
A woman of valour: by shifting this to a woman WITH valour – well, that makes this impossible list a little bit more… possible. Because this allows us to focus on the areas of doing good all her days and receiving the trust of her companions and of praising God with all she does.
The woman WITH valour is defined by her character.
Lovely.
So here’s the next step deeper with our lovely woman of valour: our Eshet Chayil.
The word Chayil is a masculine noun. Meaning it was originally intended to describe the manliest of men, as is seen over 260 other places in the scriptures. It speaks of armies and integrity in battle and strength in fighting.
So for the entirety of this Proverb, speakers of the Hebrew text aren’t limited in their understanding of male verses female characteristics. They understand that this is not about the perfect idealised wife:
It’s a message about a balance.
That’s why this “capable” wife is referred to as a question. Who can find her?
She doesn’t exist on her own.
She can’t – it’s not humanly possible.
And… the great reality of the Proverbial teaching: it’s not meant to be one person.
The teaching here is inviting a community to come together, in balance, and fulfill those roles.
What if every member of a community would bring their noble characteristics, their God-given skills and gifts, their talents and treasures, and do a little bit, to the best of their ability?
Then – my goodness, imagine the goodness that would come.
It would be hard-working and just and faithful and celebratory;
it would be good stewardship and wonderful creativity and joy-filled and loving.
It would be inclusive and affirming and encouraging and inspiring;
it would look after people and animals and all of creation, for generations to come.
It would be … well, it would be ideal. In every way. And for every one.
A community of valour; a community of love. Who can find? That community would be priceless, and everyone would want to be a part of it!
And now: let’s interject a community of faith into that role. Let’s find ways to imagine a God-loving community – a church community, even! – fulfilling the many roles and characteristics of what it can mean to BE a God-loving community.
Because: the good news is, we can all aspire to be that community. We can come together with intentionality, sharing what God has given us, delighting in what’s possible when we all come together. In love, in service, in the journey of faith that lets us try.
Because the level of efficiency and competency is not guaranteed: it takes effort and attempts and failures and practice and adjustments.
But the desire to continue in the journey, in the work, in the celebration: it’s worth it. To be the community of valour; the church of faith, the people of integrity that in all things are striving to love and serve God, and love and serve each other.
So as we journey in the calendar, I invite us to spend time in careful and intentional prayer, discerning what we are wanting to contribute to this community of the faithful:
to this church, active in the name of God in this place and this time.
Let’s come together and discuss how God is calling us to be the church that is known for its authentic and joy-filled worship;
a church known for its care and concern for all peoples,
a church that is known for its generosity beyond its walls;
a church known for being: well, a capable – and valourous - church.
A capable church – who can find?
God willing, we can find that church, as we continue doing our best to BE that church.
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