24 January 2015

Epiphany +3... "Repent, and believe!"

Mark 1.14-20

            Repent!
Okay. Sounds easy, right? That just means to say I'm sorry, and move on, right?
            Nope. Sorry.
Repentance is more than that. It's hard. It takes effort. Because to repent is not just about changing an action, or saying sorry.
            Being sorry is just being sorry. It's important, don't get me wrong. But sometimes it's just words. There's a great example going around Facebook of how sometimes 'sorry' isn't good enough. It goes like this: take a plate; smash it on the ground; say sorry... nothing's changed. Put the pieces back against one another, say sorry again - still not quite good enough.
            Saying sorry may make you feel better, but the plate is still broken. And sometimes, the plate isn't a plate; it's a relationship. So repentance goes much further.
            It's a change of the action itself, based on a change of thought and a change of heart. It's being so truly and deeply regretful about your own wrongdoing or sin, that you feel compelled to change.
            So how does that start? Well, it starts by being aware of the sin. If we aren't taking time to do some serious self-reflection, we aren't going to know that we've done anything wrong. We may talk ourselves out of it, we may ignore it, we may justify it in our own minds. Going back to the plate example, we may say to ourselves things like "It was my plate so I get to decide to break it;" "I have other plates so it doesn't matter;" "meh, the plate was made to be broken."
            But that's not always okay, is it? It's not okay if we want to be living in community. It's not okay if we want to be held accountable to one another, and to God.
            Repentance starts with thinking about an action. It takes that, and reverts back to the thought stage. It causes us to ask "Why am I doing this thing? Why did I think this was the right way to act?" This is the stage where we're looking at the broken plate on the ground, wishing we hadn't smashed it, wondering why we decided to smash it.
            Next, we go back one step to the thought process. This is where repentance has us asking ourselves questions like "What is leading me to sin?" and "why am I not thinking this through all the way?" This is the "the plate didn't do anything to hurt me, and I knew it would be messy,  and I had to go out of my way to do it - so why did I intentionally smash the plate? What's really going on here - is this even about the plate?"
            Then - even further, repentance calls us to consider the heart of the matter - our intentions. The deep, blunt reality of why it is that we're thinking and doing what we are. This is where we ask ourselves "What feelings are there that lurk behind this sin? What need is this fueling deep within me?" Here is where we admit to ourselves that the plate was an innocent bystander. It got broken because we were angry at something else... because we were feeling rejected or useless or unloved or unsafe.
            It's hard. This is the part of repentance that we don't like; the part where we have to be honest with ourselves, to go deeper than we might be comfortable with, to really delve into what it is that's the basis for our actions. And sometimes we may not like what we see. It might be easier to just ignore it, after all... but here Jesus himself challenges us - commands us, even - to go deeper. To look deep inside, to reflect on what is happening in our actions, our thoughts, and our intentions - and to turn away from sin.  Because more than likely, what has been broken is not a plate; it's not something that can be easily swept away, then replaced. It's something in our lives that is important and will be missed once it's shattered. Like our relationship with community, with friends, with family - with God.
            So repent, Jesus says. Change your heart, your thought, your action - so that you can make right those relationships that you value.

Believe!
            Okay - again, here's a word that sounds easy, but again I'm going to challenge us to dig deeper. Belief is NOT always easy. It takes effort, it takes commitment.
            Part of our challenge, I think, is that we overuse the word. By doing that, it's lost it's impact over time. Believe me, it's become a common word. *pause* Yes, I meant to do that. Yet in the scriptures, the word has so much more meaning. It has so much more significance than what we're used to today. The 'believe' that Jesus is using here is a word rich with relationship, with honest and open connectivity. It's a word that is meant to have the same life-changing, thought-altering effect that we use in the creed.
Oh wait, the creed - the statement of belief - the words we recite every week, some of us every day. Hmm. What if those, too, are words that are meant to shake us into action?
            Well, friends, they are. The words we say in the creed, those "I Believe" sentences - those should literally rock your world. Because they're a declaration of belief. Of unshakeable trust. Of complete and unchanging confidence. Of having such strong connection to the object of our belief that nothing will be able to convince us otherwise. So when we, in the creed, are saying "I believe in God!" we're saying that at our very core, that is a defining feature of who we are - and, by extension, of how we are going to act that day. Yes, belief takes our intentions, moves with them into thought, and then grows them into action.  'Believe' will move us through the exact opposite exercise from what 'repent' did.
            We have a belief. Deep in our hearts, in our inner selves, we have that desire to have a healthy relationship with God, with family, with community. Great. Who would argue with that?!
            So we then take this intention, and put it into thought. It's where we start to consider how we might build on that belief, to make it not just a concept but a reality. What does it mean to love God with our whole heart, mind, soul and strength? How am I supposed to love my neighbour as myself? In what ways am I called to serve God and the world?
            And then, we start sorting through the answers to those questions, and putting them into action. Maybe it's helping a neighbour do the shopping. Maybe it's driving a friend to church. Maybe it's dedicating time to prayer. Whatever it is, it's done with a purpose, for a reason.
            These actions, done as a result of our belief, will stand up to the questions we should be asking ourselves. Why did I do that? Because it would help build community. What led me to want to build community? A hope for a faith-filled relationship. What feelings are behind that? A desire to live out my baptismal vows, my connection with God, my commitment to the Good News.

And there you have it. Repent, and believe in the Good News.
Repent.
            Turn away from evil intentions, evil thoughts, evil actions.
Believe.
            Believe in the Good News of God - who created all things, who forgives us our sins, who sustains us all our days. This is the GOOD NEWS which has been shared with us through Christ, and the apostles and everyone who has chosen to hear it and proclaim it.


Repent. Believe. Only then can you truly follow Jesus - as he is inviting us.

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